Saturday, September 11, 2010
finger cameo/incarceration stun gun
day 3 of trip excerpt, arrested, reckless conduct, tad insight. here.
got arrested for being around my friends while they skated in downtown chicago, i sat on my board but got hauled in. "reckless conduct" is what i'm charged with. flying back to chicago on the 20th to deal with this little devil. funny thing is i was by the river in downtown second city and the boat cops came through. some street kids started yelling from the bridge and they mistook those curse words as coming from us. they hopped on land and hand cuffed a buddy of mine for saying "fuck off" or something. i sat watching and then the cop started being tough guy with my friend and handling him wrong. so i said "come on man talk to us like normal people, stop with the alpha dog routine" he was pissed, yelped to his minions for another set of cuffs, i should of this should of that but i opened my mouth instead. lucky me. he marched us on to the boat and started talking all kinds of trash to us spouting that we were whats wrong with america, that i looked feminine and was going to get fucked in my ass hole tonight in county. real skeez ball this guy was and his pitiful crew. dude took us to the fucking marine/helicopter quarters where they were stationed. this is about 8 pm. they skin us down to about nothing, cop routine. the mother fucker pockets my grandfathers pocket knife i've had since he passed away. i'll never see that again. he puts us in a cop suburban and rushes us to downtown county, we almost wreck on the way and buddy squeals like a little girl to the driver when it happens. pussy fucker. get into county, it's a mess. young black disfranchised individual yelling for water and christ. bunch of basic movie type jail situations going on. i get fed turkey bologne and a cup of water, but luckily they are issuing out single cells so i'm not roped in with a bunch of heads. by the way this whole time i've been handcuffed to a buddy i had just met about 3 days before this so it was quite the bonding time. in this cell, they gave me no toilet paper. i took to punching the air and to doing pushups to stay warm. it was unnecessarily freezing. theres a big window on the door and the guard passes by frequently but i decided to masturbate anyways. i beat it to a kaleidescope of pictures i had stained in my brain from various sexual encounters i have had. i leaned over from the bench and busted straight on to the floor, got some water poured it on the semen and then took the sole of my shoe and wiped it to the corner of the cell so it wasn't noticeable. i rinsed off my sole and put it back in my shoe and tried to see how many nba champions/mvps i could think of starting since the celtics dynasty. later, we get out at 4 in the morning, released with a bunch of Lollapalooza fence jumpers from the suburbs of Chicago. real pussy chumps they all were being on the route to the bus stop. get in to my friends apartment walk up the stairs about about 5 30 and see the remains of a huge feast and tons of empty classy beer bottles, those son of a bitches. i took some seroquel and slept all damn day. take in mind this is day 2 in chicago, the real start of the trip.
i'll drool some more random stories from the trip here and there.